Each woman from time to time begins to scroll through the wedding dress options, the possible names of children, home improvement plans and many other moments of living together with their second half. And scrolls all this until the question is asked: and how serious is her relationship and are they going so far?
Sign 1 does not introduce relatives, parents
Usually familiarity with the parents of the girl occurs in the early stages of relationships. The family in which there is a daughter, not a son, more restless. Mother and father want to know who their adult miracle rides on the car, goes to the bars at night, and who brings it to home in the morning. In order not to arise additional questions and problems, a man, in turn, is represented by parents. Acquaintance with his relatives often passes much later.
To regard as non-seriousness, what he pulls out the acquaintance can only when a man has excellent relationships with their parents. It is possible to determine this in the stories about joint travel, in conversations and in general on situations that happen in his family.
We do not accidentally pay attention to it. The family in which misunderstanding and quarrels reigns is not the subject of pride. It only means that a man does not want a meeting with his beloved with relatives, because they can spoil the well-established impression of him, it is bad to establish him, does not want to discuss in the family of his relationship, the scandal of the jealous mother or simply unworthy behavior. Therefore, first, find the reason for the reluctance of acquaintance, and after suspected of frivolousness.
Sign 2 does not introduce friends
Here is a completely different situation. We do not choose parents and relatives, but friends - yes. A man who is suitable for his companion loves her to acquaint her surroundings. The most important thing is that this acquaintance does not resemble the demonstration on which he brags rather with its status, and not the joy of communication with such a nice special. In a serious relationship, a man wants to introduce his own woman with his own close environment.
Sign 3. Rare meetings
A man who can forget about the meeting is rarely calling and appears on your guest - is clearly not tuned seriously. After all, a loving person wants to spend all his free minutes with his half. And the point is not at all in permanent employment or suddenly arising from the affairs. As a rule, those who are very mistaken in the previous partner are hidden from serious relationships. It is only salvation from loneliness, which is necessary in minutes when there are no friends next. This is the choice between them and you, in favor of the first.
Sign 4. Does not commemorate in a difficult moment
There is a huge minus in frustration - lack of responsibility for their actions between a man and a woman, full of freedom of thoughts and actions. Such relationships are often called friendship with bed elements. However, this "friendship" suggests help, mutual and respect. The difference between them from a serious relationship is the lack of plans for the future, the prospects for creating a family. And if your partner does not want to help in a pipe minute, do you need such a person in your environment? What kind of relationship with him can we talk at all.
Sign 5. Does not talk about plans for the future, about children
If a man does not talk about the future or about children, it does not mean that he belongs not seriously. There is a category of men who do not want to build far-reaching plans in order not to smooth. And nothing to do with it. But when, when talking about children or marriage, he becomes irritable, harmful and picky - the right sign that it will take another bit of time and your communication will completely stop, because now there is no development in relationships. They stand still.
However, it is worth considering that a sharp response in a conversation about children may be when the man already has one child from another woman, and he does not want the second. And also about the absence of physical opportunity to have them. It raises the complexes.
The "Stream" portal took an exclusive comment from the soloist of the group "Assorted" Anna Alina and Maria Zaitseva. We asked girls a few questions.
- In your opinion, how to determine whether a man is serious about a woman or not?
Anna Alina:
It is always visible. For me, this is, above all, the actions of a man. Words are not always true. You can say anything anything, but to do completely differently.
Maria Zaitseva:
It seems to me that the desire to have children from this woman and the proposal of the hand and heart is a serious attitude. What can be more serious in life?
- What is the frivolous attitude towards the elected?
Anna Alina:
Consumer attitude, probably. You know, it can see how desire to see, but not interested in a person, and so, for the pastime to meet with him. This is especially striking when he asks for meetings only at a convenient time for him. And the lack of attention, or when they have long been found, and he does not introduce his friends. And one more extreme, when suddenly begin with a place in a quarry. Immediately from the second date, the promise of eternal love is raised, like out of the horns of abundance, a proposal of hands and hearts. It always is alarming me.
Maria Zaitseva:
For me, frivolism is when a man seems to be with a woman only when it is convenient and uses it only as a sexy object.
- What do you think the protracted acquaintance with his parents and close friends is the indicator of frivolous relationship?
Anna Alina:
Yes. Sure. This immediately suggests that he is either shy, or he has another. In general, something is clearly wrong!
Maria Zaitseva:
I believe that it is impossible. Parents and relatives are different. And sometimes people simply have no desire to acquaint their second half ...
"How to be if suddenly finds out that a man just played in a relationship, but did not live them?" Play days and nights in a pillow, drinking sedative or, on the contrary, get into the whirlpool of fun and joy to forget. Or maybe to seek an honest man?
Anna Alina:
You just need to live on! After all, there are many situations in life in life. But everything passes, it needs to be remembered.
Maria Zaitseva:
I know one thing for myself - becomes a rag for a man and the subject of use is just awful. I do not condemn those who do that, but I personally consider it unacceptable.
In any case, if your relationship is suitable for one of the signs, you should not arrange a man's scandal. Sometimes even the most frivolous relations will develop in deep feelings. It is better how you swear in love to the coffin on the second day, to throw married to the third, and on the fourth understand that you are completely not fit to each other and disperse.
If the young man is in love, he does not wait to show his girl to his friends. Acquaintance with friends Guy is not just a cheerful party, but an important meeting that can determine the course of further relations. As if the guy loved you, on the subconscious level, he is influenced by his friends. And if they have a negative impression about you, it will not benefit your love alliance.
When meeting friends, the guy girls make the same actions that can destroy the relationship in the beginning. To join the company and lay the lover buddies, you need to properly prepare. What mistakes make girls at the first meeting with his friends?
1. behave defiantly, extravagantly dressed
People meet along clothes, so do not rush to try the most frank and fashionable dress when they gathered on this friendly meeting. As a rule, such a familiarity takes place in the usual cafe, and excessive elegance there is nothing. Do not try to look like a star, if you are beautiful, people and so wonder your pleasant appearance. But dressed up like a Christmas tree, you may seem ridiculous or vulgar.
Makeup and clothing must match the place and time, but much more important is your prudent behavior. No, it is not necessary to shy and silent. You can joke and smile, but do not overdo it. The narrowness will not decorate you. Be natural and relaxed. It is not necessary that you entertain everyone. You are a girl, not a clown.
2. Too brightly demonstrate the love of the guy
Do not prove your feelings for a guy in humans. No need to kiss it every ten seconds and cling to his hand as if he can escape from you. On caress and tenderness you will have time when you stay alone. In the public, behave decently. Of course, you can hug and slightly smack the guy in the cheek. Well, if he will behave restrained.
Do not walk down a young man in public, as if you are his mother. It may seem care to you, but men do not like when they are nurse. The girl may look in the boy's eyes a child, but not the opposite. By this you humiliate his male dignity, and he feels no longer a hunter, but a stupid loser.
3. District comrades about the guy, about his former girls
If you have problems in relationships, no one will forbid you to ask for help from your chosen one. But this can be done only after some time when you are fluent in their company and deserve their confidence. But at the first meeting, such questions are inappropriate.
Do not pier on friends with questions when the guy moved away somewhere. All you are interested in, you can ask the guy myself. Trying to find out something behind his back, you put in a funny position and yourself, and your chosen one.
4. Broasting themselves, argue with a guy or humiliate it
Rise and teach men - the most rude mistake that women allow, leaving them to people. You can make a remark guy, but so that no one hear. If you want to say something now, ask the young man to move away with you for a minute. In no case criticize and do not reproach it with other people. It makes a terrible blow to male pride, and from the side looks ugly.
If you do not agree with the opinion of the guy, you can express your position, but it is not worth proving it before the science. Do not brag about your intellect or talents, let the boyfriend praise you himself better.
5. constantly distracted, talk on the phone or twisted on the Internet
On the online dialogues you will have time at home, and here you have the opportunity to talk live. Do not ignore the attention of people, creating the impression of an important lady. Most likely, they will conclude that you are either unprecedented or they are not interested in you.
Many girls in front of the campaign in a cafe are asking friends in advance, so that they called or wrote them every five minutes. However, sticking out all the time in the iPhone - this is a sign disrespect for those who are nearby. Even business people will not be distracted by calls if they came to meet, albeit friendly. If your phone is calling, tell me to call back later. And without social networks, you can do without social networks.
6. Openly express antipathy to the guy's friends, sit with a disgruntled view or demonstratively leave
If the company of your young man did not have to do you like, do not apply. Be polite and restrained. Do not set up a guy against his comrades. For a man, friends are holy. If you think that they affect him badly, you will have to resort to diplomacy. Later you can fine and gently explain to him what exactly does not suit you in his surroundings.
Try to talk with them in their language. Descend details about their interests and moral concepts. You can also make a right picture of the environment of your chosen one and decide whether you should communicate with them further.
What is it - even more rapprochement and confidence gesture or, on the contrary, check, and possibly, and see?
On the question of why the guy introduces a girl with his friends, a simple and unequivocal response, perhaps, no. After all, all people are very different. Yes, and friends are different. There is a male friendship for many years, there is a cooperation, which is called, on affairs of the company, that is, a purely working relationship, and there are superficial friendly connections - to chat, laugh. So it is important to consider with whom it is Willing to introduce you to your guy. The reasons for a potential acquaintance with friends of the beloved will depend on the answer to the assigned question. So, let's figure it together for which the guy introduces a girl with his friends.
- Close friends. If your young man wants to introduce you to his loved ones (and maybe with two, because there are usually a lot of truly close friends), then it is most likely talking about the seriousness of his intentions regarding you. Such a familiarity seems to introduce you to a circle of people close men. Undoubtedly, it is a gesture of trust in relation to you. Your beloved by this seems to say: "You have become very close to me, I appreciate you no less than my old and proven friends, I am ready to trust you"!
Acquaintance with a circle of close friends can lead to a variety of consequences. A successful acquaintance and a pleasant impression that you will produce will undoubtedly raise your status and in the eyes of your guy. After all, it will speak in his favor and only confirm the correctness of its choice. Of course, the opinion of loved ones is important for him. In addition, a positive result of such a dating, no doubt, will also affect your friendly contacts. Perhaps now you will be "friendly families" with someone from your boyfriend's friends, to communicate close, go to visit, etc. Accordingly, it expands your circle of dating, and may somehow affect your lifestyle.
It rarely, but it happens that, on the contrary, the girl did not quite like the nearly surrounding the man, but he continues to meet with her. If this happens to you, then he will have to choose - either old friendly relationships or loved one. As a rule, in such a situation, the fortress of feelings in relation to the girl is checked. The guy only will remain with you if he is seriously passionate and intends to change his plans even for loved ones.
Usually, close friends of men in the main matters are unanimous with him. After all, it is not for nothing that they support close, trusting relationships for many years, not in vain ready to help each other if you need, ready to rely on each other. They have a lot in common, moreover, they trust a friend's choice.
- Colleagues. Usually, with this category of friends, the guy introduces when these colleagues are also friends. Or when you and your favorite work in one company, and your relationship with it only gain the character of the novel. In this case, you appear before your colleagues for work as it were in the new status.
In the first case, the desire to introduce you to be a variety of intentions. This may be a desire to trump in front of his elected colleagues (boast of her beauty, charm). Thus, a man can raise his rating among colleagues (here, they say, what a girl I have!) In general, it is not good, not bad. In principle, it is quite clear to the desire to demonstrate their male status and pride in favor. Male pride has no no one has canceled, and, accordingly, your guy can just be simply to hear from colleagues Forest feedback about you. But if the guy demonstrates his girlfriend to colleagues, only to assert him, he undoubtedly loses in your eyes. It is likely that he will not boast anymore at all, and this is not the best option. Close more closely to your satellite!
In the second case, your man just wants to open before all your relationship. Here when a guy introduces a girl again, he seems to make you colleagues in the new status. It can be done and a little joking tone, and quite seriously. In this case, it is worth supporting the intention of a man. After all, you yourself are undoubtedly interested in the two colleagues you perceived as a couple. So play your beloved if he undertook to tell about it in a joking tone!
- People. Perhaps this is the only option where you can have a more or less reasonable alertness regarding the goals of acquaintance. Well, if the guy wants you to introduce you to your friends - buddies in order to support relationships, chat, etc. But it happens that he introduces a girl with buddies, for example, to stick together about you, but even laugh. From the bad options - familiarity with the goal of boasting you for the sake of raising the status among buddies (we talked almost about the same in relation to acquaintance with colleagues).
It happens that the guy's desire to introduce a girl with his friends worth the intention not to show it, but just the opposite. Often a young man just wants to show you how he lives, who communicates with. Perhaps it is he boasts his friends in front of you! Support it, tell me that you really liked his company. Find common topics for conversations, enter their circle. Especially if it does not strongly contradict your own views on life. Remember that much worse when the guy does not want to acquaint the girl with his surroundings. So, or he is embarrassed, or he is too jealous and therefore hides you even from friends, or he is something from you (or someone else) hides. Perhaps he leads a double game? Do not communicate with such! Relations with him will not bring you happiness, but many forces and time will take a lot. Look for the one who trusts you and your interests, and your friends, with whom maybe you will not be sorry for a happy to live a lifetime. And this, you see, quite a few!
In the life of each girl sooner or later a guy appears. Each pair before the beginning of the relationship was their personal life. Relationships begin not from scratch. Together with a loved person in the life of young people, a whole luggage of other hobbies, dating, friends will come.
Of course, it happens that relations begin to develop in the company among common acquaintances, and in this case the problem of relationships with friends is not acute: each remains itself. But most often, it is novelty, mysteriously attracts young people to each other, and everyone will inevitably begin the circle of dating.
So, one day a girl will have to meet with friends of the guy. From this acquaintance, perhaps the dynamics of their further relationship will largely depend.
So how to behave? What model of behavior with friends of a young man is correct?
The answer to this question cannot be unequivocal. It depends first of all, from the personality of these most friends. Two extreme polar situations are possible:
Situation 1. Friends of the guy - a vicious circle, from which it needs to "snatch".This complex situation that requires a separate analysis, in many respects other than the topic of our article. In this case, the question does not arise how to behave, but there is a situation of complete restriction of communication.
Situation 2. Friends of your guy are wonderful guys. They have long been friends and in their relationship there is a certain "fraternity", that is, they are divided by joys, together overcome problems. It often happens that this friendship remains for life, and over time, people begin to be friends with families. It is this situation that we take for the obvious.
Understand the special attitude of the guy to friends is easy, because During the meetings, the young man talks a lot about his friends, calls them and demonstrate their existence.
Friends Guy - part of his life. Becoming also part of his life, the girl will have to share the free time of a young man with them. And here there are several scenarios for the development of events, in each of which the girl is experiencing a certain role:
- The girl tries to like him to friends, because To their opinion, the guy listens, their attitude believes important
- The girl begins to jealous to friends and try to displace them from the guy's life, because he spends a lot of time with them
- The girl is trying to abstract from the friends of a young man
- The girl is trying to become "his" in their company
In fact, both of these scenarios are erroneous.
Error 1 - "Ah, what a girl ..."
Trying to please friends, the girl often forgets that she communicates with men. And excessive friendliness, smoothiness, sociability and desire to be pretty in their eyes are often perceived as flirting or "flirting" and may be incorrectly appreciated as frivolity and accessibility.
In addition, such behavior can be offended by the guy himself, cause jealousy or negative attitude. Of course, in the soul of every girl there is a dream, about how all men are in love with her. But do not forget that men have somewhat different attitude.
Error 2 - "or me, or they"
Jealousy to friends and past life "before her" is a typical state for many girls. Before acquaintance with the girl, a young man led a full life: he had hobbies, met with friends. Pushing in his life a girl, the guy must "clear" for her place. It happens not immediately, but gradually: everything is happening everything is not necessary, not important, not significant. And the more durable and more seriously developing relationships, the greater the place in the life of the guy takes the girl. However, it does not want a long development of events, preferring rapid relationships, incorrectly associating them with love.
Wrong settings:
- If I loved, I would call in the morning
- If I loved, I went to the movies with me, and not with friends on volleyball
- At all meetings with friends there must always be a place for a girl
- Your friends are more expensive to me ...
Familiar? This is not a claim, but the manifestation of jealousy. Such behavior strains the guy, destroys his self-sufficiency and comfort, causes the need for a constant choice.
Error 3 - "Princess without the Kingdom"
The girl pulls away from the company of guys, behaves slightly arrogantly and inaccessible, considering such behavior as correct to the guy, demonstrating that it does not have to do with this "kingdom." Her behavior shows, maybe not superiority, but not exactly the location of friends. It will also disturb the guy, because He will realize that the girl is bored and not interested with his friends. The fact that the two worlds are: the past and real, do not join together, will lead to psychological discomfort guy who can make incorrect conclusions. Although, in fact, the behavior of the princess is just the game of the girl, the desire to show their inaccessibility and feature.
Error 4 - "Your Guy"
The girl's desire to like the friends of the guy may have another extreme: the desire to become a "her boyfriend" in the company of the guys. It is caused by such a behavior with the desire to divide their hobbies, to become part of the guy's life. This can manifest itself in joint gatherings, visits to sporting events or some purely male entertainment. At first glance, this may seem correct, but with a detailed analysis of the situation it is easy to understand what behavior leads to the destruction of relations. This is not about the situation when love arises from general hobbies. In this article we consider the situation when friends guy presents "their own girl", and not the same as they are, a guy.
What to do?
Let's hope that several tips will help answer this question.
- Do not strive to take some place in the company of friends (Princess, "your boyfriend", etc.). Remember that you came to this company already in a certain role: the role of the girl of your boyfriend, and no other roles need to play here. I realized this, you easily strengthen this company, while the only thing you need to do is remain. After all, it was for that of you loved your boyfriend.
- Do not require increased attention. In the company of friends their special world, and you came to this world, and not they are in yours, so just try to be interested in their hobbies or at least pretend that respect their choice.
- Do not demonstrate your superiority in different situations. It is always unpleasant, and among friends is simply unacceptable.
- Do not jealous to friends. Your boyfriend should not choose, because the man needs and friends and beloved woman. Believe with understanding to boys and meetings with friends without you. Remember your meetings with girlfriends, where much is discussed, which does not need a male presence.
- Do not speak badly about his friends, do not make the guy be ashamed to friends or justify their actions, because it will always do it, because He is one of them. Even in a situation where you are dissatisfied with the behavior of someone from friends, try to speak out about the act, but about your emotions, feelings in this situation. Do not set up a guy against friends.
- Be wobble with your boyfriend's friends. Come so that they do not feel the threat of their friendship and did not start responding active actions.
These simple tips will help you strengthen relationships with your guy and save friends who are purchased in childhood and youth, and often closer relatives.